at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
