You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
