Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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