i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
