Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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