one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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