It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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