I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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