my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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