some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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