So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
