hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
