at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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