he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
