That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
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