Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
