i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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