Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
