Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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