I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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