So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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