im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize