Sry I called you an 8
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
