I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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