omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
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