just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
