At least make sure they are 18
Why
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Randomize
