I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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