1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
how can u be prego again
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
