kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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