My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
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