Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
