so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize