I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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