So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize