It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
