Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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