TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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