Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
They are going to name an STD after you.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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