Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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