yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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