he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Randomize
