Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
