Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
