So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
