i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
tell me about the eggs
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
