uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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