Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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