Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize