Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize